Finding God In Music

12 Stones: Crash & Burn

As much as I enjoyed it at first, one of the most overplayed songs on American rock radio to this day is Evanescence’s “Bring Me to Life.” Though the song was a huge success in 2004 and earned Evanescence two Grammy awards, one less-noticed element was the appearance on the track of 12 Stones lead singer Paul McCoy. The partnership was meant to capitalize on the success of 12 Stones self-titled debut album and headlining tour for Christian rock-megastars at the time, Creed.  While both 12 Stones and Evanescence would maintain careers into the present, with each releasing or working on new albums in 2020, their peak success was in the early-mid 2000s and 12 Stones self-titled debut was a key element in that.

The album is pure, unfiltered, unadulterated post-grunge rock, but is littered with faith and scripture references that aligned with the Christian-rock movement being led by groups like Creed and P.O.D. at the time. The stage is set for the faith struggle immediately, with the first lyrics of the first song “Crash” being:

As I lie tossing in my bed…

Then, with the last line before the first chorus, the biggest fear is revealed, with McCoy wondering if Peter’s denials will be reciprocated toward him when he passes on into the afterlife:

Will you deny me when we meet again?

The chorus goes on:

And I feel like I'm falling
Farther every day
But I know that you're there
Watching over me
And I feel like I'm drowning
The waves crashing over me
But I know that your love
It will set me free

This scene is reminiscent of so many of our lives. Separation from God in our lives is not something that happens instantaneously, but typically happens slowly over time as a falling or drowning of sorts. In many moments, a foundation of faith reminding us that God is there, loves us, and is waiting to set us free is the strongest thing encouraging us to keep going.

So how do we dig ourselves out of this situation?

As I find truth where I found it times before
As I search for your hope
I'm finding so much more
And I try to be more like you
And I deny myself to prove my heart is true

The songwriter finds himself once again turning to the Bible for truth, and as he does, finding much more than he asked for. How often have you, after falling behind on your Bible study or whatever it may be, finally opened it back up simply looking for a little peace of mind to help you sleep, but instead found something that made you say “well, I could have used that four days ago”? Then, the songwriter re-commits himself to his effort, trying to be more like Jesus and working on self-denial as a sort of repentance.

Seven songs later, “Soulfire” has a simpler lyrical approach, starting by laying out the daily routine of the writer:

Every morning as I wake to another day
I bow my head hit my knees and I begin to pray
I search for answers that I wonder if I'll ever find
Running circles in the mazes deep inside my mind

While simple, even this paints a familiar picture for Christians as we pray in search of answers. The mazes inside our minds are just like those on a restaurant children’s menu, as our asking “why” may be dead ends, our asking “what are you trying to build in me?” may reveal a path forward for some time, and our questions of “how can God be just yet allow so much injustice, and be loving but also so angry?” probably just take us in circles. We won’t exit the mazes until he makes the answers clear in his own timing.

Still, the songwriter reveals that this search does provide some relief and gives him the energy to continue forward:

You always take me to a higher level
Show me something that's deep inside
You show me things I never knew

You push me, you pull me

You set my soul on fire
You take me so much higher
Higher again
Thank you for it all

Being a debut album, 12 Stones self-titled collection holds some of the rudimentary traits you expect from a group just starting out. However, it also reveals a surprising amount of openness and honesty about what starting a relationship with Christ is like. Due to that, the purpose of the album is truly two-fold. If you come to the album looking for angst-filled hard rock, you’ll find that. If you come looking for honest self-examination and refreshing peace, you’ll find that too. I’ll examine both in future posts.

Album Review: Audio Adrenaline - Worldwide

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IKn2K7dA-9s&list=PLrJmxeJFncVYaZYQPO2fhOeHziBDxZm1Y

In early 2003, Christian rock band Audio Adrenaline was past their peak success but still hard at work, having released six albums between 1992 and 2001. However, 2001’s “Lift” had been their least successful album to date, which  meant that the upcoming “Worldwide” would be critical to determining whether the band could stay around or would struggle to grab a foothold in a changing music scene. While “Worldwide” didn’t reach the success of earlier albums, it did outperform “Lift” and earned the group the 2004 Best Rock Gospel Album Grammy. This kept the doors open for the group to record one more album before splitting up in 2006 due to singer Mark Stuart’s spasmodic dysphonia, and two more albums with a new lineup later on.

The lead track, Worldwide: One doesn’t offer much in the way of substance but is upbeat and sets a high-energy stage for the rest of the album. Following that, Church Punks is a punk interlude between the lead track and the rest of the album and call to the more youthful members of the church to come out of the woodwork.

Following that, Dirty establishes the tone for the remainder of the album. Stuart’s voice sounds like some combination of Tom Petty and Ryan Adams, the music creates a party vibe, and the lyrical call to service begins with a plea for Christians to step outside of our physical and emotional boundaries:

Step outside the walls, we build to protect us, don't be afraid to get some mud on your face come on come on everybody come on come on and serve someone

The chorus emits thoughts of hard work and service projects, and asks listeners to ponder their meaning and purpose.

Lets get dirty, lets get used,
no matter where you come from,
if you're beaten up or bruised
lets get foolish, lets get free
free to be the one that, you were meant to be
lets get dirty

Before the song then asks listeners to put aside their doubts in the value of their work:

You might stop to question and wonder what it’s worth
You might slip and fall from the burdens that you carry

Following “Dirty”, the slower but melodically sound “Go and Be” presses listeners who leave God in church on Sunday:

You're like a letter that's never mailed
You're like a hammer without a nail
You've been standing in this place for far too long

You come to the table and you get fed
Then you hide it inside your head
Why not open up and start to run

Go and Be nothing less than you
'Cause you begin in Him
He'll show you what you need to know to
Go and Be every single day
Go and Be

For the next three songs, the lyrics go from aiming at an audience to aiming at the Lord himself. The more hymn-like “Pierced” and “Pour Your Love Down” ask God to shape the singer and bridge the gap between human and divine: 

We’re worlds apart

The distance between us is just too great

Draw me close

let me know you’re near

The reason we sing is to bring down your glory

Show us your face

Pour your love down

And cover me

Those two songs sandwich the more folksy “Strong,” which finds a man finally surrendering his life to God:

I will follow, wherever You lead me

Wherever you are underneath this star is where I want to be

And I will lay down, this old life of mine

I'll leave behind all the things of this world just to follow you

And I'll be strong, and courageous,live my life for you my only king

'cause you're my God, through all the ages

Here am I, I am Yours, send me

Slow, catchy, and relatable, “Leaving 99” offers a reminder of God’s presence in all situations:

I'm lost and broken all alone on this road

The wheels keep turning but the feeling is gone

When I fear I'm on my own

You remind me I am not alone

You say..

I'd leave ninety-nine

Leave them all behind

To find you

The mid-tempo “Miracle” optimistically points to times when the Lord “ruins” our lives and replaces them with something better, before “Worldwide: Two” brings back the group’s namesake adrenaline; which carries over into the live-recording sounding “Start a Fire.” In stereotypical fashion, things slow down for the final song of the album, and “Ocean Floor” offers a reminder of forgiveness:

They're not a pretty sight to see
But they're wiped away
By a mighty, mighty wave
A mighty, mighty wave

They're all behind you
They'll never find you
They're on the ocean floor
Your sins are forgotten
They're on the bottom of the ocean floor

In all honesty, I did not listen to much Audio Adrenaline during their heyday, so I was skeptical of what I would get from reviewing a 17-year-old album. However, much of this album is not only fitting for that period, but also holds up well over time. A few of the songs in the middle of the album fall flat, but overall, it’s a refreshing listen.

Final score: 6.5/10

"Home" by Switchfoot

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HHSDcsIbRD0

Grammy award – winning Switchfoot’s more recent albums, as well as singer Jon Foreman’s solo albums, explicitly reference God within their lyrics. However, references to God in their earlier albums were usually more veiled.

Take for example the song “Home” off of their first album, The Legend of Chin. The first few lines are fairly empty and meaningless. But by the third sentence, the band cuts straight to the heart of the human experience:

It's a long way from my thoughts to what I'll say, it's a long, long way from paradise to where I am today

How often in our lives are what we think and what we say worlds apart? How often is what comes out of our mouth better than what we think internally? How often is what we say, much much worse than what we intend to be? And in our daily reality even on our best days, aren’t we a long way from the paradise promised to the criminal on the cross next to Jesus in Luke 23:43?

All that's in my head, Is in Your hands

This lyric, reminiscent of Psalm 31:5, holds a meaning for both our present and our future. We have to take our current hopes, dreams, and thoughts and give them into God’s hands for Him to handle. At the same time, we must also allow God and his word to shape our minds and mold them, which may very well include an adjustment of those hopes, dreams, and thoughts.

It's a longer road ahead of me, the road that I've begun. Stop to think of all the time I've lost, start to think of all the bridges that I've burned, that must be crossed

These lyrics scream of a man starting truly starting out on a faith journey, which doesn’t seem unreasonable for a band whose members were 21 when the song was released. Like a single step like a cross-country road trip, one day seems like a small step in the journey toward sanctification. As we’re finally prepared to start that journey, it can be discouraging to think about the opportunities we’ve missed out on, or the wrongs we’ve committed that either must be fixed or can’t be fixed. Or, it can be a motivating factor to accelerate our journey forward.

Later comes the warning to be wary of some of the plateaus that we can face in our faith journey:

I can see the stars from way down here but I can't fall asleep behind the wheel

The chorus repeats the request for God to take control, the admittance of faults, and the hope for eternal life in Heaven:

Over, over, over, take me over. I've been poison, I've been rain, I've been fooled again. I've seen ashes shine like chrome, someday I'll see home

So often in life we commit sins that we thought we’d kicked and know we have to get rid of, and afterwards we have to admit “yes, the Enemy fooled me again.” But by letting God take over again and trusting in him, we will one day see home.

The music itself in the song is slow, simple, and melodic. Not necessarily something that jumps out at you. However, by painting a picture of what it’s like to start out on a faith journey and the roadblocks that most people will find along the way, this song very well justifies Billboard’s review of the album at the time that called it "An intriguing and surprisingly mature effort for a debut release."